What's going on, Albuquerque?

She's a Wayniac!

I was taking a small metals class in the art department at UNM in 1983 when I decided I needed to create a shrine to Wayne Newton.

Let me explain...

The headliner for the Fourth of July concert in 1983 at the Washinton Mall in D.C. was supposed to be the Beach Boys. Our Secretary of the Interior at the time, James Watt, announced that all rock bands attracted the "wrong element" and instead invited Wayne Newton to sing for a "wholesome" program.

Huh?!

I was amused. That fall semester I knew I had a mission. I immediately wrote to the Wayne Newton fan club and got an autographed picture of him in a tuxedo. I created a huge metal belt like the ones heavyweight boxing champions wear. I put Wayne's picture in the middle of the belt on a spring so that when you tapped it, he would rock back and forth. A friend in the ceramics department created huge chunks of "turquoise" to decorate the belt. It was fabulous!

I took over the glass case in front of the jewelry lab and lined it with red crushed velvet and put blinking lights all around. Wayne's autographed picture was ornately framed in gold. The masterpiece - the belt - was in the center of the shrine.

People in the art department thought that I was really in love with Mr. Las Vegas. I've kept up the front for all these years and now I must confess. I really only loved his hair. Danke Schoen.

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Comment by Diego on November 21, 2007 at 10:42am: You really had me fooled, I thought you were head over heels about him. I just got back from Vegas and was thinking of you becuase they had to take him off the strip because of some kind of medical emergency. I never understood the facination with Mr Las Vegas, OR Liberaci.

Comment by bleve on November 21, 2007 at 10:42am: You know when you leave people confused for years that you're ahead of your time in terms of social critique... good job.

Comment by Benny the Icepick on November 21, 2007 at 10:45am: “We don't have to protect the environment, the Second Coming is at hand”
--James Watt

Good thing he's so focused on being wholesome. From Wiki:
In 1995, Watt was indicted on 25 counts of felony perjury and obstruction of justice by a federal grand jury.

One of my least favorite political figures in recent history.

Comment by Benny the Icepick on November 21, 2007 at 10:46am: (PS - great story. Had me laughing)

Comment by Michael P. "Martini Mike" D'Arco on November 21, 2007 at 10:50am: But who is the young lady in the photo?
HAHAHA

Comment by hbl on November 21, 2007 at 10:53am: OMG! Where is the belt now? I would pay BIG money to see that work of homage! Tee-hee "he would rock back and forth" Great story!

Comment by Adelita on November 21, 2007 at 12:07pm: First, does anyone remember the Broadway Elks including Danke Schoen on their set lists? Now you know why they used to sing it!

hbl - I've moved too many times...it's long gone. But the picture of Wayne was one of him with both arms out and thumbs up. Made the rocking back and forth very special!

Rudolfo - Ralph Lewis was my man! I took sculpture from Jason too. And some grad student with a long beard from Indiana, I think. Do you remember Fitz? You do look awfully familiar......

Comment by Bosque Bill on November 21, 2007 at 12:34pm: Dang, I'd managed to forget about Elmer Fudd... er, I mean James Watt, now you go and raise the dead! Ahh, but Wayne makes it all right, I'm listening to the record via your link right this instant. I can almost see him swaying and snapping his fingers on our black & white TV screen. Wonder how many readers associate the song with Ferris Buehler? http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0091042/

Comment by once banned twice shy on November 21, 2007 at 1:37pm: I'm thinking Wayne would love to have that belt and would pay you handsomely for it. That is, if you'd be willing to part with it.