Whether you’re a Burqueño, a Northeast Heightseño or a Nob Hilleño, you know it. I know it. Coronado Wieners are where it’s at…wherever that may be. They’re the bomb…and the packaging looks like one too--like a case of dynamite from a loony western cartoon.
I once debated with myself about smuggling a two-pound, pink package of Coronados with me on a plane. But I feared it would have caused panic with the TSA once the wieners hit the x-ray. I also wonder—can these things cross state lines without FDA approval? I need to get a permit maybe. I've never seen them sold anywhere else.
And I’ve never paid attention to the package until now.
Ingredients: Beef , Pork, Mechanically Separated Chicken, Potassium Lactate, Sodium Diacetate, and Red 40. Whoa. I totally picture some dude in a pair of overalls making these things somewhere in the remote desert like a meth lab.
Red 40. That must be the pink, delicious juice that drips from the package. Sounds disgusting, but whatever…it’s damn good. There’s even a Red 40 website I don’t want to read, ‘cause I just don’t care.
Cooking them is a ritual too. Slice down the center, length wise. Make sure the frying pan is set with veggie oil. Put ‘em in and let ‘em sizzle until they’re brown or black depending on your taste. It's easy:
Pull out your first victim, and lay it down in the center of a tortilla like you’re changing a diaper. Mustard & green chile are optional, but seriously recommended. Wrap, eat, and repeat.