I want a grandbaby. That is no secret. Even folks that don't know me know I want a grandbaby. I see babies everywhere & want them. My eyes glaze over. I can't exactly explain it but it is like what I have seen other women go through when one day they see a baby somewhere & suddenly have to have a baby. Right then. Usually the women are a lot younger than I am but I suddenly truly understood what they had been saying. My good friend had a baby last year but that baby's grandmother hasn't learned to share.
No pressure here. I do want my son & his wife to live their own lives. Really. I try to meddle as little as possible but am probably about as subtle as a B-52. I catch snips of conversations at family gatherings & know that they are "trying". The details of what this means (other than the obvious & what I grilled out of his favorite auntie) is not something I am going to bring up next time I get him cornered. He's a grown man, for pete's sake. Unless, of course, he brings it up first, then it-is-on! I decided to turn the whole situation over to the universe, as if I had any control anyway, ha. Nothing could ever change my love or disappoint me in any way as far as son & DIL go. baby or a cheweewee dog in a sweater, I will hug & kiss 'em. I do adore those two people. My family is a large part of my life.
Still, I do like to "Help" the universe in my own little ways. On our front gate hangs a found object sculpture of a girl with bicycle chain braids hanging on each side. She looks a little like my DIL, who likes to wear braids. I had some old hub caps laying around that I had wanted wired up too. For some bizarre reason, today was the day this had to be done. fertility prayers. offerings.
Spirit moved, this cannot wait til the man gets home to help. Has to happen now. I am out there doing a job that requires at least three hands & working on both sides of the gate. I can't pop up & down off of the ground like I used to so I decided to roll back & forth instead. The dog makes a break for it so I continue my rolling but now have to add "the screach" getting dog back in yard. Then by using one leg to hold things one one side & wiring on the other side, I got it. I said yahoo. Then the whole thing slides down to the ground. I might have said a bad word but I mainly laughted out loud. My neighbor hollered if i needed some help. I laughed again & told him "No, thanks. I'm mad now, won't take me long & I have to do it by myself." A few minutes later I had gotter done.
Once done with the gate, the dog, Uno & I rolled around in the sunshine on the warm sidewalk. I looked up into the sky & couldn't believe how blessed I have been in this life. Right Now. Right here. In the sun.